This just in...

[triadruid]

Helzberg Diamonds officially gets the Bad Man Hat for their current "That Guy" ad campaign. If you haven't seen the billboards (I assume they're doing print and television as well, but we can avoid those), it's things like:

• That Guy enjoys giving his significant other a pedicure. Since you're not that guy, there's Helzberg Diamonds.
  
• That Guy makes a quiche for breakfast. Regular guys go to Helzberg Diamonds.
  
• That Guy likes painting her toenails....
  
• That Guy goes down on both knees...

The last one in particular is confusing, and we spent a good chunk of yesterday's evening commute trying to decipher it. That Guy gives oral sex, and therefore should be mocked? That Guy is a submissive? Eventually we decided it must have something to do with marriage proposals being done on one knee, with both knees indicating subservience to your Woman. Or pants.

I already think the entire diamond industry is a crock so I wasn't going to purchase from them anyway, but this sort of behavior from a local business calls for public mockery. So, mock I do. Mock mock mock.

---

In other news, my computer has developed revealed a few idiosyncrasies. First one came when featherynscale could share network folders with me, but not vice versa. Turns out it was just being Really Slow in updating the network tables... but later, after a totally painless update to (K)Ubuntu 8.04, it refused to load PCGen when hers was working fine. After about an hour of cursing, the culprit turned out to be OpenJava, which was pre-existing from when I installed the first time. Her more-recent install had Sun's Java by default, which PCGen requires.

And the point of THAT story is that we're 99.7% ready to send out the character sheets for the Gygaxian Grinder on the 26th (we've scrapped the Friday start, in favor of Saturday morning cartoons and an all-day, single-day affair). As soon as my co-mod signs off on it, those players who will be starting us off should expect an email and another post in this vein.

Which brings me to the fact that Google Sites rocks my socks. That is all.

Comments

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

I have hated all Helzberg diamond ads since I moved here. The previous campaign seemed to have the message "You can buy your way into her heart, if only you shop here" (with a side of "never mind the guys that she actually *likes*, diamonds will put you over them in a heartbeat").

Now, we have "You can be a good partner by caring for her, or you can be a good partner by buying her expensive jewelry. Choice two is the Real Man choice, guys who are just decent and will do stuff for her are probably faggots."

What the shit is that? I ask you. I mean, right, not like I am all that keen on diamonds or the diamond business to begin with, but really. If I were going to buy fine jewelry of any sort, I sure as hell wouldn't buy it from these people.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Was Helzberg the ones with "Jump to the top of her speed dial.", too?

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Yep. Their website has some examples of their current television ads, which are also about what That Guy does. The site copy describes them as 'hilarious'. I bet.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Describing your own stuff as 'hilarious'? Classy.

[rfunk.livejournal.com]

Sounds about right for the ad business, I'm afraid.

[kaymyth.livejournal.com]

What the fucking fuck?

Ugh, they're trying to tap into that whole caveman vibe. "Og like woman. Og give woman food. Og give woman sparkly. Og can provide for woman!" Og's gonna get his fucking nose broken.

Angry Peep is angry.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

I'm a bad person, because I laughed at the Family Guy "De Beers" commercial.

Still, that's satire. Presumably these guys are for real...

[kaymyth.livejournal.com]

Family Guy is funny because it's supposed to be daffy. :)

But these people.....argh. The sad thing is that there really are women who are that shallow.

[rougewench.livejournal.com]

I think that the both knees thing would be finished (if thinking about standard socialization) as "and beg forgiveness"...i.e. talking to men about buying diamonds as a "make up" gift.


D.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Wow. Did not even think of that. That (Faggoty) Guy apologizes in a heartfelt manner, you (Real Man) can just buy your way out of the situation.

Ick.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

That's possibly worse, and one I hadn't considered.

[malvito.livejournal.com]

To make things worse, that says that their diamonds are better than the potential Og-Man buyer's ability at Make Up Sex.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Well, given his unwillingness to get down on his knees, that's not entirely surprising. ;)

[lilia-blackbear.livejournal.com]

but this sort of behavior from a local business calls for public mockery

While I agree public mockery is in order, Helzberg Diamonds is not local. It's a chain. And those particular ads are nationwide ads. Apparently, that's supposed to appeal to the cultural sexism of the nation...

Stop! You're both right!

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

It's a national chain, but it was founded and is apparently still based in Kansas City.

Re: Stop! You're both right!

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I meant local in the sense that Applebee's is local. :)

Re: Stop! You're both right!

[lilia-blackbear.livejournal.com]

Look at that... the base for card companies, jewelry chains, restaurants that offer no vegetarian options... geez..

In Evansville, one of the top jewelers is Kruckemeyer and Kahn. Good Germanic names, but saying them outloud and knowing they sell jewelry makes me giggle.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Also, your last link, it is made of broken.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Shit, I thought that might have been too clever for my own good.

Fixed.

Jewlery Commercials Make Me Twitch

[leiandra.livejournal.com]

I see those around here too. Jared commercials make me want to stab somebody.Markman's is just as bad and it IS local (to me). They mostly paint the man out to be a fecking moron who wouldn't know to go to a jeweler if his Mama had told his Daddy to tell him & the women....oh my GOD I want to just slap these petty, shallow, materialistic beyotches. Grrrrrr.

From about the first of October until the middle of February, osh and I are nearly constantly bitching about the jewelry commercials for Christmas & Valentine's Day. We get about 6-8 weeks of reprieve then they start up for graduation & Mother's Day. It's insanity.

Yeah, I've got a diamond, but a) it came from Friedman's and b) it's tee-nincey and I'm more than happy with it. I'd also be perfectly happy with an amethyst or sapphire (actually, a little more so).

Re: Jewelry Commercials Make Me Twitch

[leiandra.livejournal.com]

I forgot about my absolute not-favorite store. Kimball's started in Knoxville in the late 1800's.

Two of their billboards that absolutely make my head spin -

A pair of nice dangly diamond earrings with the text "Marriage Counselor"

A disembodied forearm wearing a sparkly diamond bracelet with the text "She only pretends to like football"

Re: Jewlery Commercials Make Me Twitch

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

At least the last time I heard a Jared ad, they weren't too bad (mostly emphasizing the 'inexpensive' part, when diamonds are a price-rigged game anyway, but whatever), but I hear you about the constant barrage. We get a lot of it here in the spring too, before the June OMG Wedding 'season'.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Also also, yes, the characters that are up on the google site look fine to me.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Thanks; new post made (can you see it? you weren't on the filter before, for some dumb reason). If you get a chance to shoot an email to the players, fine, or we can just do it tonight...

[daneya.livejournal.com]

I couldn't agree more about those ads. I don't especially care for diamonds anyway; I tend to find colored stones more interesting. (Also the knowledge that their value mostly results from market monopoly dims the sparkle a bit for me.) In my crazy world, "That Guy" is the one who would exhibit the behaviors promoted by those ridiculous ads.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Your crazy world seems to be very popular around here...

[royal-spice.livejournal.com]

Yes--what you said. I hate the ads, and the diamonds they are selling.

And, "That Guy"? Real Women *lovelovelove* That Guy. And he definitely doesn't have to buy diamonds...particularly not after making a quiche, painting my toenails, and getting down on both knees. Srsly.

These ads are just designed to make Stupid Lame Macho Guy feel better about his inability to cook, paint in the lines, or simply...ok wait, maybe that one's a little challenging for Stupid Lame Macho Guy. ;)

[kaymyth.livejournal.com]

I certainly don't need the diamonds (I mean, seriously, roll a ball in glue and dip it in glitter. It's still shiny! SHINY!)

But, um, gotta say.....This Guy, That Guy, The Guys In My Icon, Any Other Guy, NONE of them are touching my feet. GODS NO, TICKLISH FEETS.

*squirms*

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Seen as a sop to Og, they're somewhat less offensive, except for the gross commercialism. :)

[liquidfun.livejournal.com]

Well, I've installed PCGen and I have to admit that I have failed as a geek. I went part way through creating a character using the tool and gave up.

I have a thought on a character ("Donny the Druid") that started out as a science geek, working in the school labs, caring for animals and developing skills related to animals, ecology, and pharmaceuticals ... who likely has social issues when dealing with people.

If I draw up my "regular" character sheet in WordPad and send you a .DOC and a .PDF, s'cool?

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Heh, no problem - PCGen's got a bit of a learning curve.

Yeah, just writing it up on a regular character sheet or in WordPad is fine. :)