Something is wrong in my brain

[triadruid]

If and when I ever get a full night's sleep, I feel like I've wasted many hours of my life that I could have been doing something.

This isn't a new phenomenon, either; I've been this way since high school, at the least. My insomnia is as much self-directed as it is chronic...

::edit:: And yes, I did get ~8 hours of sleep last night. featherynscale says I look better. I don't feel much better, except for the not-nodding-off thing.

Comments

[cynthiaweb.livejournal.com]

Sounds to me like you have been indoctrinated/infected with a variant strain of the Protestant work ethic that may possibly be malignant. It sounds like even if you're not doing actual work, you feel like you have to be productive or useful. Well, just so you know, sleep is really, really useful to your body. Um, it's also possible there is really just something different about the physical side of your mind-body system. It may be useful to approach this from both sides of the system, by introducing pro-sleep information to the mind and calming breathing exercises (for example) to the body.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Yeah, if an eventual solution occurs it's probably going to be a combination of tricking myself and reasoning with myself...

[cynthiaweb.livejournal.com]

OR you should be able to get into research study on insomnia, if that would amuse you.

[archway.livejournal.com]

~soft thoughts...no reason other than listening~

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Thankee-sai.

[capriciouslass.livejournal.com]

A has this same issue... I've heard him say that he hates sleeping because he feels like it's a waste of time. I'd suggest you two talk, but you'd only reinforce each other. :)

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Hmmm... I'm gonna go for Door #2, Bob.

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

Can you buy off the nagging voice of guilt by telling it how much more you won't get done if you die early of a heart attack? That, to me, would seem relevant.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

That sounds promising. Didn't they do a study recently about sleep dep and heart attacks?

[featherynscale.livejournal.com]

True story! That happened!

[kaymyth.livejournal.com]

Consider this: once your body has achieved its desired amount of rest, your brain will go into a more active dream-mode. This will lead to A) remembering more dreams, and B) a mechanism by which you can learn more about yourself and the universe.

Plus, at least for me, dreams are crackerjack entertainment.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

I occasionally have good/weird dreams, but they're not really a selling point for me. And I already have more lines of inquiry into the universe than I can process now...

See below for more.

[biscuitgod.livejournal.com]

I remember that you have written about your vivid dreams in LJ and it seems you have had times when you do get sleep. I also remember you saying that this insomnia happens periodically through your life. Seeing what you have been going through of late, is there any similarities to stressful situations through your life that might correlate to your periods of insomnia? I don't remember you being a snorer but sleep apnea has very many variants. I remember when I was sleep deprived and the stress it did put on my body. Your body will shut down when it needs rest and if you're not careful it can hit you like a power drug and put you to sleep behind the wheel. Now that I've placed that little bit of fear into your mind. Worrying about not sleeping is the same as telling you not to think of brown chickens. So now, you're thinking of brown chickens. I suggest that you pick a time before you want to go to bed and download somewhere all the crap banging around in your head. Put it to bed before you get into bed. I know. . . easier said than done, but do what works. Nighty night, sweat dreams.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I have had less memorable dreams lately, probably partly due to sleep deprivation directly and partly because I'm tending to sleep in as much as possible in the morning once I DO get to sleep, hence not having time to write them down when they do happen.

The point about the brain dump is well taken, it just feels like I'm juggling so many things of late that stopping to sleep or write them all down interferes. Of course, my instinctive habit to stress-relief means I spend uncounted hours fucking around instead of actually making a lot of headway, but it still means that 'actually doing' comes above 'making a list of what to do', even if they both come behind 'goof off' at times.

[celticwhistlin.livejournal.com]

I was gonna pull the sleep apnea card but biscuitgod beat me to it.

It is totally worth talking to your Dr. about. Especially if it is effecting you physically. They may recommend a sleep study and may be able to give some suggestion.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

It seems unlikely, since once I go to sleep I sleep very deeply. And I hardly ever snore.

Has anyone ever NOT gotten a diagnosis for a problem for a sleep study?

Sleep

[ravenspirit70.livejournal.com]

Well sunday you looked like one hellva sexy beast........

mmmmm kisses.....

Re: Sleep

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Haha, bags under your eyes are the new eyeshadow.

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

You might get a lot of useful info for re-programming your brain by googling "sleep deprivation study." I'm just sayin'. :)

And on a more personal note, when I fell and split my scalp open in 2004 and had to get 7 staples? A direct result of sleep deprivation from my work schedule - and I was only cutting back to 6 hours a night. One has to wonder if your recent bouts with toe-stubbing are a result of your sleep deprivation. Hrmmm.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Interesting thought.

[matchgirl42.livejournal.com]

Oh! Wikipedia to the rescue! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sleep_deprivation) LOL

[malvito.livejournal.com]

Sleep is overrated. Why spend all of that great Internet time sleeping? Especially if I can just nap off at work ...

[rougewench.livejournal.com]

Well, chronic sleep deprivation contributes to long term pain issues and possibly to fibromyalgia. You need to occasionally opt to sleep. Perhaps setting yourself up for one night a week to opt to sleep a longer period...just so that your body can get what it physically needs.


D.

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

*nod* I already manage/have to schedule most of the 'big fun' I have, so trying to plan what nights to sleep 8 hours might be useful.

"Truth" From The Internet

[daneya.livejournal.com]

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1812420,00.html?xid=feed-yahoo-full-healthsci

When I have insomnia, it's usually stress-related. I have found that I need to adjust the usual advice to "get up and do something else" until I am ready to sleep. The thing is, if I am doing something interesting or enjoyable that fully engages my mind (like reading a good novel), I don't feel tired. What works for me is doing something that uses up "just enough" attention to quiet the extra brain babble, like playing solitaire, or working a crossword puzzle.

As for "tricking" yourself, you might try reviewing what you got done during the day, so you are less focused on what still needs doing. Even though I have only met you a handfull of times, I believe it will be a rare day that you have not accomplished more than most people.

Re: "Truth" From The Internet

[triadruid.livejournal.com]

Well, it's never really as much about what I've accomplished as what I have on my plate/"to-do" list. I'm not very good at looking backward and resting on my laurels.

Offloading the list, though, MIGHT make a good insomnia-time activity. Active enough to focus the brain, tiring enough to make you want to sleep, provided it doesn't guilt you into staying up all night long. Hmmm...